All the Noise Inside My Head

I went somewhere in my head and you couldn't follow.

I tried to let you in with words and more words. But the more I said, the more it all came out wrong and small. I could feel your callousness toward me growing with every line. But the noise inside my head was too great, a cacophony, to show you what I meant. And all I really needed was for you to tell me I was not a game to you. That I still meant as much to you as I did on that Monday. That I was not foolish for trusting. 

But I could not ask for what I wanted. And you could not follow me through the noise. So instead I felt you pulling back, retreating. Away from me. Away from us.

Now the noise has settled. And I'm standing in the aftermath, shaking, unsure. Are you still here with me in the silence and serene? Or did the clanging send you running?